Category Archives: prettypretty

Tyransanity

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I already love this season of America’s Next Top Model, it’s got major crazy potential.  

Tangent, I heard a coworker mention me as liking “food and crazy people.”  I love that they’re beginning to really know me.

To start off, instead of showing the tape of the auditions, Tyra decided to dress up and reenact them herself.   No seriously, that happened.

Then.  Tyra has this big group of girls and they’re socializing and the judges are picking the girls to go on as contestants, from another room.  Then all the girls are given envelopes and told that if their picture is inside, they’ve been chosen to be a part of this cycle and if not they’ll be going home.  Half the girls get a photo, and are elated.  They’re led off and NEVER SEEN AGAIN.

The group of “rejects” are taken to collect their luggage and then Tyra informs them that SURPRISE, they’re going to the models’ apartment because they are in fact the contestants for this season.  I’m sure I’m not the only one who, witnessing the sea of delight and hugging that followed, wondered about the first group who thought they were the winners.  Did one of the Jays, or perhaps Tyra appear to break the JUST KIDDING YOU LOSE news themselves, or were they just poisoned or shot to avoid the trouble?

Ok so THEN, the girls go to their photo shoot/runway show and it’s them getting their picture taken during hair and makeup backstage at the photo shoot.  One girl (Brittani [whom we like]) has her eyelid folded up during makeup, a moment that is captured and makes second best photo for being, and I quote the judges, “so hot.”

THEN, the girls are carefully taped inside big inflatable hamster balls full of glitter and told to walk down a runway that is a balance beam.  That is floating in a pool.

Naturally two girls (only two!) fall off and are now in a big beach ball floating with no traction, and are expected to save themselves.  Before the oxygen in their bubble runs out.

 

One rather bubbleheaded girl muses that she is worried she’s “spend the rest of her life in that bubble” without being able to get out.  I don’t think she’s referring to the suffocation risk but in light of that it suddenly seems like a valid objection.

The girls that fall try to will their balls to the side of the pool by flopping around in them like dead fish.  No one in the audience or backstage makes the slightest move to help.

It’s a beautiful concept and no thanks to anyone but the models, no one dies

The girls then move into their first elimination panel and are understandably very nervous.  Tyra only wishes to discuss her tshirt, which has a giant picture of fellow judge (and Vogue editor) Andre Leon Talley.  Andre Leon Talley is wearing a top hat that has it’s own ponytail, bobbed and sticking straight up as if in indignation. 

I love this show more than ….. well more than most things.

So for who I like (“we” referring to the royal we of Aurora and I, as Aurora is too busy to watch regularly but likes to lustily cheer for my choices when she gets that rare moment [Aurora is the best best friend ever]), we like Hannah.  She’s so pretty!  with so much hair and energy and eyeliner!  and so far, not the slightest whiff of bitchcrazy!!

We also like Molly, Brittani, Dalya, Ondrei and Mikayla.

 

We like Sarah but we’re concerned about her potential.

Who do you like?  And can someone explain Andre Leon Talley’s hat to me, please?

Hello from Denmark!

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They say traveling will really teach you a lot about yourself.  So far I’m learned that going 60 hours with no sleep and adding two cocktails to the mix will create a very interesting VJ.

Other things I’ve learned include:

87% of this planet’s attractive men are currently in the Brussels airport right now.  In a suit.  Just standing around.  I had to sprint through to make my connection, and I’ve never wanted to stay and improve international relations anyplace more.

60% of those men appear to have been on their way to Copenhagen.  I think I’m going to like it here.

Also?  Danish nachos are AWESOME.

Danish nachos are delicious

A new life.

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Several months back, my friend Drea’s husband sent her flowers, and as I snapped this picture, my favorite picture of her, I remember thinking that I’d never seen her look more beautiful and content and ….. womanly.

And there was something to the sparkle I saw that day.  40 weeks later, yesterday, the first day of spring, Drea gave birth to little Audriana Casey.

America’s Next Top Model. Yes, again.

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Dear Naduah,

………. that was over quick.  Why you gotta be like that, huh?  I LIKED you.  I TRUSTED you.  And you got weird.

Love, Valancy Jane

I think Anslee is my new favorite (her ears! so cute!), but I’m a little gun-shy because the promo for next week shows her yelling at another contestant.  We all know how I feel about that, so we’ll see.

Raina could steal my affection, I think.  This photo below is perfect, in my opinion.  (Other than them feeling the need to airbrush out the nipple but whatevs.)

Simone needs to “push through it” as Tyra would say, but I think she’s got all the ingredients.

Ren is great ……. but lets face it.  Ren is going to quit.  Oh and I’m entirely certain her name is actually Lauren and she’s just trying to sound edgier.  Which is totally fine.  But I’m calling her Lauren now.

Aurora has tentatively picked Jessica and I don’t entirely disagree.  Aurora won’t like that I think of her as a little vanilla, but she’s good and I’m willing to change my mind.

It seems remiss not to mention Brenda, because she’s doing well, but I just can’t muster up much of an opinion on her other than a vaguely positive feeling.  We’ll see.

Angelea laid low this week, giving Alasia a chance to showcase some major crazy.  (And butt cheek.)  Someone tell her it’s a modeling competition, not a yelling competition.

Lord knows I don’t mind a little butt cheek, but let’s leave this post in a better place, shall we?  Here’s another shot of Anslee, modeling a perfume that begins as a color.

A perfect day

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To commemorate Aurora’s birthday, she and took a train trip up the coast to LA.  We splurged on business class tickets, and definitely ate our money’s worth in free coffee and pastry.

We did lots of shopping in the various ethnic neighborhoods that surround the train station, Little Tokyo and the Mexican old town area, Olvera Street.  But for me the highlight was being joined by my little sister ZezZee, my childhood friend Jessica, and the legendary Miss Kendra, for dinner in Chinatown.

And as we left, I paused for a moment to drink it in, how much I love my life. And how big a role the wonderful friendships I have with women, with these amazing women, have in that happiness.

So …..

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Yeah, I guess I’m trying to tell you something.  This is CT and he can beat me in trivia most of the time and he kissed my neck before he kissed my lips and he Tivos the Daily Show for me and makes a damn good breakfast and I don’t really want to say anything more but I did want to say ….. that.