Category Archives: giggling

“I’m going to buy you a barbie.”

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I think that’s the purest expression of love a two year old girl can give.  She was in the sunday school class Bethany teaches, and she looked up at Bethany and said it so sweetly.  When Bethany told me about it, it became kind of an expression between us. 

And when we bought stocking stuffers for each other, I guess we both had the same idea.

Yes, that’s a pony riding little girl barbie for me, and a wolf riding surfer barbie for her. 

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The Downstairs Neighbor

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Good Lord, what person under the age of 50 pounds on their ceiling with a broom handle?

In his defense though, I suppose, who over the age of 11 jumps on beds?

Who would you call ….

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…. if you were shoved into a booth with 14 fabulous gay men in varying degrees of soberity?

Clearly there was only one date awesome enough for brunch with my gay husband at Mo’s All You Can Eat (and drink) Brunch.  I think you know who I mean.

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That’s right, bitches.  The one and only Miss Kendra, “Pepper,” “Dizzy Van Damn!” and the great love of my life.  She charmed everyone, and earned a round of applause for fitting the four decker sandwich in her mouth.

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When people ask why I seem so perky, it’s mornings like this that I point to.

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Walkie Talkies

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The following is a list of things said into walkie talkies, at the zoo, by Lola and/or I.  It’s a wonder we’re not banned.

– “We have a monkey flinging poo.  Two civilians down.”

– “I’m out front of the rhinos.  Why do I only see two rhinos?  ……………. Uh, YEAH.  ………… Yes, I realize what this means.”

– “All is calm here.  News apparentely hasn’t spread yet.”

– “I can confirm, yes, hole in the condor net.  The condor hasn’t noticed it yet, so feed him NOW, or we may have a much bigger problem on our hands.”

– “Send Marci to the gift shop for some of those iron on patches.  Maybe we can make the hazmat outfits look like standard zoo keeper gear…”

– “How do you ACCIDENTLY leave THREE gates open?”

– “I TOLD you it was a bad idea to put the pandas next to the nacho cart, but did you listen?  *heavy sigh*  Get the baby shampoo.”