I am an entirely sensible girl.  Until you mention ponies, or glitter, or nachos.

Life conspires to spoil me.  You’ll see what I mean.

Facts?  I’m 29, I live next to a big warm ocean, in a house with my brother Jesse and his wife Bethany.  Neighbors get confused about who’s related/married to who sometimes, sometimes it’s because I throw around words like “Mormon sister-wife,” and “bought from a cult.”  I like a certain amount of confusion and chaos.  My brother does not like confusion and chaos, but he does like me.  Bethany shrugs and refers to me as a performance artist.

They’re very good people and sweetly overlook that I’m a commie liberal agnostic.  I never make fun of their matching Sunday School Teacher t-shirts, because I could never love two people more madly.

Most of the time I wrote this site, I worked for a computer manufacturer, and I had such an amazing time there.  We worked, we danced, we drank, we played.  I grew up there.  I think of it like most people think of high school.

Bad times and layoffs happen.  I was taken into the fold by a band of darling accountants, who were so sweet.  I bid them a fond farewell after a few months, and I’m focusing on finding something I love to do, other than my boyfriend (more later).

My friends are abnormally attractive.  It’s not why I picked them, I swear, it’s just a side effect of their being Chronically Awesome.  They simply do not make better people than MY people.  You’ll see.  Collectively, we like to nerd out over outdoor concerts, museums, hiking and really awful movies.

Aurora

Drea

Buckman

Lola

Jadon

Angelica

Coco and Lou

Chip

Lacey

I have two perfect sisters, Bug and ZezZee.  There aren’t enough words for how lovely they are, but I often try.  They dazzle me.

I have five other flawless brothers, but you’re not ready for all that handsome, admit it.  You’re still reeling from my sisters.  Fine, here’s Nick, and we’ll get back to the rest when I think you can deal.

Utterly charming, no?  And that’s not even the one that brings me flowers every spring.  YOU’RE NOT READY FOR THAT ONE.

I have a cat named Dulce, and a rabbit named Rudolf, and they both have pretty strong opinions about treats (and the way I wear my hair, oddly enough).

Other things you’ll learn about me here?  I don’t think vanity is much of a sin.  I think science is romantic.  I order books faster than I can read them.    I CAN be entirely serious, especially if we’re talking about the environment, abused animals, or how insane Tyra Banks is.  (VERY.)  My heroes include Tyra Banks, Albert Schweitzer, Zelda Fitzgerald, Dolly Parton, Carl Sagan, my adoptive mother Bunny ….. you know, people with big bouncy hair.

And the biggest thing you could ever know about me is that I’m in love, dead wrecked on a boy.  He owns me and lights me up like a street light.  He is the best thing I think this old earth has ever spun out.  He’s careful and kind, and has the bravery and the sense to laugh more than anyone else I’ve ever met.   If I find out the Big Bang was just our prequel, I won’t be a bit surprised.  I think only two people understand the enormity of the day I met him: him, and his poor, poor postman, who has to deliver all my pink, adolesent letters.  For now we’re far apart, but someday we’ll share a last name and a front door. 

Anyway.  I ALWAYS tip street musicians and face painters.  I pack light and don’t forget a thing.

If for any reason you feel like you haven’t seen enough pictures of me, add me on Facebook, and if that inspires you to talk dirty (or scientifically!) to me, I’m at Gmail.com.

Oh, and I can perform your wedding.  God hasn’t struck me down for it yet, although he did get pretty close with a meteorite while I was marrying Zia and Lele in a hot air balloon.

True story.  But you’ll get used to that sort of thing around here…..

30 responses »

  1. *cries* Such a tragedy! Yet…Corky Romano? Hmmm…. I picture you more as a Traci Ulman sort of girl. But, your new blog already looks very pretty!

  2. dont know about the advocado thingy im one of the fastest in the north now that ive figured out how to swalow the stone

    my dog brodie is faster than me can send picture if u dont belive

    was fun meeting u on the plane usually i sit next to really boring 250 lb people who put there earphones on and elbow jab u

    im sure everyone was listening to u and having a good laugh

    the drunk naked scottish guy from the plane

    ps hope u had a fun holiday miss jane

  3. I just recently came across your site. I’m a friend of John-Mark Cullen and his wife, Megan. He had a link on his blog to your website and…well, here I am!

    I really enjoy it!

  4. So moved, so touched. Such virtue I have not seen before in a women. I am truly blessed to know you and to be part of this experience. I can’t wait to wear my ValancyJane Polo Shirt to work. Then, everyone will know the truth about M.H.I.M. and how awesome he is. Spread the word sister… HALLELUJAH!

  5. mmmmmmm Heros Are REAL! Mine is Valancy keke with some Sriracha Hot Sauce on the side please =) SFD Approval Love! Thank you. Chu Chu, HelloLotus >- .-< PS. I enjoyed this part very much "I ALWAYS tip street musicians and face painters. I pack light and don’t forget a thing." purr

  6. Hola Chica…
    I dont have that song but i have to say that
    i too am on the for TWO songs from weekend at bernies II.
    i understand how u feel about the song cause it is just amazing in every way possible.. it is unf@#king believeable that such a good song is lost to the world.. And the scary thing is i watch the movie at least 4 time a month and now the song is starting to become old to me and i dont even own it.. good luck on your search if you havent already found it.. hopefully one of us finds the damn song..

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