….. well, anyone at my doctor’s office. Right down to the parking attendant, everyone is so nice to me I keep expecting them to try to sleep with me. The entire experience is like rolling around in a giant hammock full of baby ducks and labrador puppies.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go lick the dumpster out back, or slam my fingers in the door or something, so I can go back. I need to tell Yvonne, the Polish lab nurse who calls me “swveetgurrrl,” that I would like to adopt her please.