I promised Aurora I wouldn’t go, and Andrea that I would.




Go or stay?


22 responses »

  1. Pg. 16: You stay inside, content to cuddle with your cat and drink merlot while staring at the city skyline. You start to doze when Mau starts speaking:
    “Veej, I know you think I don’t know any better, but I know what you’re up to.”
    “What do you mean?!” you reply.
    “You’ve been planning it all along, and well, I simply can’t allow that to happen.”

    Before you can protest, Mau pulls out a ray gun and you are disintegrated, never knowing which evil scheme he was referring to.

    Pg. 34: You go out, as you told Andrea that you would go with her. It’s not every day your friend decides to get a tattoo of Fred Willard on her lower back.
    “If this can’t get me some ass, I don’t know what will.” Andrea says as you stroll through the Gaslamp District.
    As if you understand completely, you respond “Seriously, I can’t think of anything hotter than ol’ Fred looking up at you while you tap that ass.”

    You are about to enter the tattoo parlour when The Rosies, the local overweight lesbian gang, tries to mug you for Hostess snacks. As you have no Twinkies and Andrea has but a single SnoBall, the Rosies maul you and leave you for dead. If you want to live with sweet scars to share with your friends, turn to page 58. If you want to give up and die, turn to page 61.

  2. Suggestion noted and promptly dismissed. I am a busy man who simply knows how to multi-task. Today I have filed 4 reports, conducted training with several associates, had several business calls for Racket, conducted several calls for the day job, followed no less than a dozen customers around as they acted shady, eaten breakfast (at noon), eaten lunch (at 4), had meetings with two managers and a lead, dicked off on Facebook, written reviews for four books and a CD, set up four interviews for Racket and designed 5 different banners and two postcards for Racket. Your bit took minimal time, but it has maximized impact. I rule at multi-tasking like none other. The day is still young.

  3. ok. i’m sorry but did this become like the blog of the emperor? because of the long comments and constant entries i’m not really sure.

    and we stayed and had low sugar cupcakes. 🙂

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