Ever seen a dog when they take her puppies?

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As a human adult woman, I understand perfectly what has happened, that my baby has died, and my brain is processing that information.  But it’s complicated because on an instinctual, biological level, my body is like that dog.  It’s this constant feeling of  ‘where’sthebabyyouhaveababyit’snotwhereit’ssupposedtobefinditfinditfinditDOSOMETHING.’

Is that awful?  You have no idea.

And there’s nothing to do but ride it out, as my body slowly and chemically sorts out the fact that there is no baby.  And that the only thing to hold is the lab report on “the results of conception.”

Booze doesn’t help, and Lord knows I’ve checked.

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9 responses »

  1. Pingback: And the presents helped. « Valancy Jane

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