Rules of Order


Valancy Jane says:
If we start a fan club, we have an excuse to have meetings and serve punch.

New Kid in Marketing says:
And get a vacuum tube?

Valancy Jane says:
We could vote on that, yes.
We could put a committee in charge of it.

NKiM says:
What about a dog?
Like a team mascot?

Valancy Jane says:
I mean, all in favor say “aye.”

NKiM says:
We could spray paint its fur with a stencil, and it’d walk around the office all day, sporting our [company-approved] logo.

Valancy Jane says:
EH is half a yes, so the ayes have it.
I volunteer to be the stencil painter.

NKiM says:
I suppose a yes-and-a-half with no opposition would win.
I’ll be the stencil maker.

Valancy Jane says:
Which means I get a new badge on my sash.

NKiM says:
You have a sash?
I want one too.

Valancy Jane says:
Hello? Consult last meeting’s minutes.
Of course we have sashes.

NKiM says:
Oh. What color?

Valancy Jane says:
Mine says “Miss Congeniality” and yours says “God.”
They’re light green.

NKiM says:
Hmm… I know a few people that might object to my nametag…

Valancy Jane says:
Such as ……………. God?

NKiM says:
For starters, yeah.
Him and most of the other people I’ve ever known.

Valancy Jane says:
We got licensing rights. It’s not wholly unprecedented.

NKiM says:
They don’t like me THAT much – although I’m pretty good.

Valancy Jane says:
We used the same rep King James did.
And not to name drop or anything but Jesus and I are pretty tight.
Us Jewish liberals tend to stick together.
Plus, he goes to my spin class.


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