So the last week I’ve actually acted like I have something of a life. Gone out, seen people, gone to parties, etc. And in sorting through all the pictures, I noticed something troubling.
Sadly, this is not an isolated case.
What the hell is this face? Why am I making this face, at least once a party? I don’t recall ever wanting or trying to look as though I’m about to be poked in the eye by something that smells bad. There was some wine involved, but not near enough to blame it. Why? Why this face? Because it’s sooooooooo sexy?
As soon as we’ve sorted this little mystery out, we can discuss why the hell I do things like this.
….. “She’s like a five year old. She could punch you in the gut and you’d still find it adorable. She can do no wrong.”
Happy Birthday, darling. We all love you.
*other than the Internet, of course.
…… but I kinda like my rental truck.
I think I’ve been living in my redneck neighborhood too long.
….. that can be safely played at elementary schools and AA meetings.
Everytime a contender on American Gladiator explains their plan for the next event and uses metaphors that make sense, take a drink.
Also, anyone who thinks Hogan’s hair is real, take a drink.
My Homie in Marketing – “And the Employee of the Year is ………….. [Coworker L]!!!!”
Valancy Jane – *cheers*
Sumer – *cheers*
Valancy Jane – “He so deserves it.”
Sumer – “Yeah.”
Valancy Jane – “We danced at the Christmas party, and he was the only guy who didn’t put his penis on me.”
Sumer – “Wow.”
Valancy Jane and Sumer – *stand and cheer*
“Well, I work with her husband. And one day he lost his phone. And I was just looking through the pictures to identify the owner of the phone. Sooooooooooo, that’s how I know her. Really well.”
Having a friend on Facebook with your exact first and last name. The news feed always keeps me on my toes. “Wait, I’m single now? When did that happen?”
And for that price, it had better make my car look this good.
Is it counting down?
Will it explode?
Will that be a good thing or a bad thing?
So many questions.