Let’s help Jonny find a name.
28Aug07
Jonny says:
Do you think there’s a market for alcoholic chewing gum?
Valancy Jane says:
YES.
Now that you’ve mentioned it, I MUST HAVE A PIECE.
Wait.
Jonny says:
**Waits**
Valancy Jane says:
Am I an alcoholic?
Jonny says:
You will be once “Fun Gum” hits the shelves.
Though I need a better name.
Alcochew?
Filed under: actual conversations, booze, jonny | 25 Comments
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Bubblebooze?
Buzzing Bubble?
How ’bout just Hooch? As in, would you like a stick of hooch? *chuckle*
NICE.
Souse Juice.
Presented by Mickey Finn. (trust me, google it for the slang version.)
And tell him he needs to get that british chick that does the commericals for orbit gum. The one that has the one sparkling tooth. But make her extremley intoxicated in the commericals and have one where she’s standing in line to meet Prince Charles. When it’s her turn to meet him, she shakes his hand and then reaches over and pinches his ass. Then laughs hysterically. Then sticks another piece of gum in her mouth (she must already have a big wad of it showing through her cheek, like it’s chewing tobacco) and then have her wink at the camera. Then pass out. On top of the Prince.
Amber, I hate to speak on Jonny’s behalf on this, but I think you’re the new VP of Marketing.
ha. Amber that should actually be a childrens book. ha.
Hahahahaha!
Maybe Jonny’s company could do both. Make alcoholic gum, and inappropriate children’s books.
If Norma thinks that should be a childrens book then I think she should be VP of Marketing.
Oh no not me. I have too short of an attention span. Besides, I’d chew up all the profits.
Hee…heee…chew up all the profits….on the gum….which you chew…..which is made of alcohol….which is something you get addicted to….heee….heee…i love norma.
and Norma loves you!
*hicccup…
I think I need more gum.
*weaves back and forth with pieces of gum hanging out of her mouth*
I’d like to, hiccup, toast Mickey Finn’s (our company name if Jonny allows) VP of Markers, hiccup, I mean, Markerters, I mean, hiccup and giggle, Musketeers, Norma, who is, hiccup, wonderful in all ways. Also, hiccup, VJ, our VP of taste testing, she’s over there in the corner, no not that one, that’s Ralph, our janitor. The one with the glitter in her, hiccup, hand. Yes, the one sleeping, hiccup, she works hard, okay?!! *Starts to cry* This is meant to be a beautiful moment, why are you messing it up, hiccup and cries, Oh hell, someone pass me another piece of gum, I can’t be in this condition when our King Jonny comes. *weaves about*
Marry me again?
yes, hiccups, if we can bring the gum on our honeymoon. And the wedding.
I think the gum will sponsor us. And I don’t mean that in an AA sort of way.
Oh think of the fun we can have.
Our dress can be made from the little pieces of gum glued together. I think I use the “Midori Sour” gum so I can have a bright green dress. What about you?
I think I’d go with a more traditional margarita dress.
That will look lovely with your Tequila Sunrise bouquet.
And my champagne veil?
Yes, lovely as well. I think you should wear your Bloody Mary stilettos too.
I thought you were wearing those, and I was borrowing your Seabreeze hair clip as my “something blue.”
Now ladies, you’re getting a little off topic. Alcoholic chewing gum is a serious business.
Jonny, you know better than to interfer in a woman’s WEDDING PLANS. Surely you remember that from any one of our own weddinds. If you recall, I even killed you once, over the cake topper.
I agree with Johnny. I would SERIOUSLY love to chew some alcoholic gum during my work hours. I think it would make for more exciting days. or at least my breath would smell like my manager’s.
Climb that corporate ladder, baby.